Lauren writes:
I have a 7 month old who is habitual waking at 3/3.30am for a breastfeed. I know at this age he should be sleeping through. We put him down at 7.00pm. He has solids at about 4pm and then a bottle at 6.30pm. I always (now) try and put him down awake so he is learning to fall asleep by himself. (I previously breastfed him to sleep which I know is a big no no). Anyway for the last 2 weeks we have tried to get him to stop feeding at 3am, however I am finding this extremely difficult and am getting very tired. I basically go in to him to check that he is dry etc and then try and shush / pat / kiss him back to sleep. Doesn’t really seem to be working – should I just leave the room and let him cry it out????????
HELP.
Hi Lauren, we’re not very conventional here at SIFTW and what I would say is that 7 months is very little and you are not alone in having a baby who doesn’t sleep through the night. Actually I won’t tell you how old mine was when he started to sleep through MOST nights, as it could be taken to be a little bit depressing. It’s little solace when you feel like crap every morning because your sleep is broken, but I think your bubba is doing quite well for his age. Do you have a partner who could get up with baby in the morning and allow you a little bit of a lie in to catch up once in a while. Even a sleep in once a week can do wonders, I find.
It sounds like the shush/pat/kiss is not working too well at the moment. I would probably take the route of least resistance, the one that gets him back to sleep ASAP, and yes, that probably means feeding him. There’s plenty of time to drop this habit later as their diet moves more towards having a proper dinner and their tummies can go longer.
There are those crazy babies who sleep through from a few months old, but I really feel that they are the exception.
Best of luck.
xx
June 13, 2008 at 11:35 pm
Props to you Lauren for actively trying to get your baby to fall asleep on his own. He is still pretty young and if you dont think the shh/pat is working you could try the Gentle Removal Method (ie. nurse until he’s drowsy put him down awake)… Or since you say its habitual you could try the Wake 2 Sleep - it doesn’t make sense, but it works for some people - maybe 30 minutes before his normal night waking go in and pick up and place him back down. i dont think you have to actually wake him up, just enough that his sleep cycle is bumped a bit… just some ideas. I personally used the Baby Whisperer’s pick up/put down method to get rid of the last night feed (with DH’s help of course) but that wasn’t until my son was 10 months old.
June 17, 2008 at 4:04 am
The 7 month old wakes up ONCE to nurse at 3 am and she is COMPLAINING??? WTF is that??? My 16 month old HAS NEVER ONCE SLEPT THROUGH, NOT EVER! At 7 months, she was still waking every 2 hours and there was NOTHING we could do, NOTHING that helped.
I don’t mean to be snarky, but I wouldn’t complain for one second about a 7 month old waking up once!
June 17, 2008 at 8:17 am
You’ve certainly been dealt a difficult road Finngarian. Hats off to you.
June 18, 2008 at 6:26 am
I think a lot of 7 month old babies have trouble making it through more than 5 or 6 hours without food. I had good luck with dream feeding my son at that age around 10, and then he wouldn’t wake hungry in the middle of the night, and I got more sleep. I kept up the dream feed until he was about 14 months old. He would still wake once a night for awhile, but would go right back to sleep with a few words and reassurance.
July 1, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Mine didn’t sleep through until 10 months, and even then it was sporadic. Don’t listen to any “should be”s, esp at 7 months. Most of those guidelines are crap. Sleep will come, I promise. Until then, I suggest nursing whenever the baby wants to. It will make your life easier and that is healthy for you both. Take care.
July 5, 2008 at 5:48 pm
I second my opinion to finngarianmama. My 12 mo. old little man is still waking up more than once. I work, too, so my exhaustion level is way off my scale.
I am aware that Lauren is frustrated. But consider yourself lucky. By all means, try the cry-it-out method, if you believe that would do the trick. Just remember, every baby is unique. They are just as individuals as we are, the adults. So, whatever recommendations there are about ‘making parenting’ easy, don’t always buy into it. Because at the end, these so-called recommendations do strip away the individuality, if we all adhere to them.
July 17, 2008 at 10:31 pm
Zach is 18 months old and on a good night wakes three or four time. On bad nights he can wake every hour or so. He only goes back to sleep if he gets the boob. I would love to wean him but he just doesn’t seem ready. I’ve tried sleep training ‘ala’ Super Nanny but he’s so stubborn he’ll literally cry for hours (even though I sit in the room (no eye contact), put him back into bed with a hug etc). I gave that up and tend to take the path of least resistance. I’m so shattered it’s effecting work and family life. Sleep training worked for my oldest son who is now 31/2 but it didn’t work for me - I found it very harsh. I’m not sure where to go from here. Any advice on weaning him off night feeds would be appreciated!
July 22, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Hi Nadia, that sounds really tough. 18 months is meant to be a typically tough time. Sleep regression type stuff. The Imp is still mostly sleeping at night, but it can take an hour to get him to sleep in the evenings now, which for us is rough as he used to go to bed so easily. My feeling is that you might want to wait a few months (if you can) until about 21/22 months old, then hopefully you might have a slightly easier time of it. The best advice I have to offer is to recruit your partner if possible to take over the night wakings. It would be difficult for you to do it, as you are so associated with milk. But dads can often be a blessing when it comes to weaning, particularly at night. Best of luck, and wishing you sleep filled nights soon. xx